In between cars

I am in car limbo. I have a car outside my house that doesn't drive. I have bought a car in Essex that I will be driving tomorrow. I have to wait until Harold is scrapped before swapping over the insurance and recovery.
Graham will give me a lift to pick up my new car- a burgundy Ford KA who will be called Hattie. (I rotate the genders when naming my cars!)
.My first car was  Bruce, then there was Mollie, now Harold then Hattie in tribute to Harold who is such a grand old man!
I am so looking forward to driving again.
I haven't gone proper food shopping since Harold broke down as I simply can't face lugging all the shopping home as I used to every day before I learnt to drive. I am resorting to eating the weird cans of stuff that end up at the back of the cupboard that I never usually get around to eating...
I would rather not have the shopping delivered either as I like picking the fruit and veg myself. I guess I am set in my ways?
It makes me think of all my habits, the things I like/ dislike doing.
While it is nice to change things around and do something different every day there are some little habits I positively enjoy having.
One is taking my dog for walkies to certain places. Ollie likes this too. He particularly likes going on walkies where he has to go in the car first and can even pick out my car from other cars. He is going to have to re-learn this however as he won't be hopping into a Kia Pride any more, he will need to look out for the Ford KA! Debden is one of the places Ollie particularly enjoys. Here is a photo of one of our camping trips with Graham. Harold is in the background.

adjusting to having no car

It has been strange seeing my old car, Harold, parked outside knowing that I can't drive it. Since it broke down I have been looking for a new affordable car and arranging to get poor old Harold scrapped. This has not been as simple a process as I had hoped as the scrap man did not turn up yesterday as arranged so now I will need to wait until Monday to contact them and see what happened. I cant buy another car until this is done as I will need to switch the insurance over from one to the other.
As I wait I reflect on how my life has changed since I learnt to drive.
Only a few years ago I told myself I didn't need to drive and didn't want to drive but that wasn't strictly true.
When I was 18 I took and failed two driving tests and gave up. My heart wasn't in it as I was very environmentally aware and believed cars to be the main pollutants of the planet.
I still believe a large number of people use their cars too often and seldom walk if they can drive but in this part of the World in 2014 it can be very tough and somewhat limiting if you do not have access to a car.
When I was bringing up my kids I walked everywhere and used public transport and lived close to where I worked.
That all changed when I became a teacher as I was required to travel to lots of venues that weren't very accessible by public transport.
For me to be able to work at the last setting and my existing setting having a car has been crucial. I also need it for boot-fairs, to get to appointments and to get to training venues with my two businesses.
Shopping for food is no fun without a car either.
So a few years ago my desire to be able to drive increased but I still didn't believe I could do it until someone I was close to at the time paid for 10 driving lessons for me and told me I could do it.
At the time I didn't believe I could afford to learn to drive and was virtually certain I could never develop the skills but their faith in my ability somehow changed everything.
I finally decided I would try and found myself a patient driving instructor.
It was hard. I struggled to remember the basics and when it came to taking my test failed a further 6 times. ( Yes 6 times!) I paid for all my lessons and for the exams myself after those initial 10 lessons. I somehow managed to scrape the money together. Initially I re-took the tests as I didn't want to let anyone down as by this time my kids and my friends were rooting for me and kept asking how I was getting on. After a couple of test failures stubbornness kicked in and I was determined to pass. By this time I was completely invested in learning how to drive and actually believed I could do it.
It was an incredible day the day I actually passed and that is when I truly learnt if I want something enough I will get there in the end as long as I never quit.
It turns out that after all that practise I am a confident driver ( albeit a pretty hopeless parker!)
I feel unsettled not being able to drive when I want to and seeing poor Harold waiting patiently to be towed away does make me feel sad.
I guess many people would find it weird to feel emotional about a car but Harold represents a lot of things to me and has played a starring role in many of my adventures over the past 4 years!

Now I know this photo has nothing whatsoever to do with what I have written about but I was looking for a car related photo and found this hilarious photo of my lovely little cat I used to have called Fisher and I had to share!

Free!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLS3HLEEiWw

I love taking inspiration from people who have created great things. Artists, writers and musicians offer us all so much. Architects, film makers...you name it, there are so many people who have managed to share their incredible gifts with The World.
Nature teaches us so much too.
Taking time to stop and look around me every day, listening to wise words, beautiful sounds and gazing at magnificent sights all help me to realise daily that I live in a wonderful world and I am lucky to be right here, right now and that I have the ability to achieve what I wish to achieve if I act on my own creative thoughts and feelings.

Spring has arrived and I will say goodbye to Harold!

I was walking along today and all of a sudden Spring has crept up on us!
the flowers are out in force, the leaves are that new lovely green and it was sunny!
The are spring lambs in the fields and today I even saw some llama's!
It is so nice to have longer days and shorter nights. We will be camping before we know it!
Tomorrow is Harold's last day.
I will be very sad to see him go. He was such a reliable car and a real character if you believe that cars have characters ( I do!) He was lovely to drive! What a legend...

sand and stuff!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nC2gZMNkyJo
It has been a good day.
I am so glad the trains are running well and I am able to sit and read fascinating books as I travel along.
There is a good chance that I have found a suitable replacement car...  ( I will know more in a couple of day as it is being put through its MOT) and I have decided that the next car after that will be a Mini!
The sun has been shining and despite all the dust settling over everything it was lovely looking out of the train window at the beautiful Kent countryside whizzing by.
Many teachers and children are celebrating the fact that they have one more day of school followed by the Easter Break.
Ollie and I miss having Jack around. ( He went back to Falmouth this morning)
I miss him and Clarrie, my daughter but I am so happy that they are both following their dreams and have ended up living in such a lovely part of the World.
I am so proud of them!

Everything has changed

Life is definitely a journey and you learn from all the twists and turns. I learn most from my mistakes I realise.
Circumstances crop up and unexpected things happen that we have to adapt to continually.
I used to be a natural born worrier.
I spent a lot of time imagining all the things that could go wrong. It was exhausting.
Things started to change around a year ago when I seriously started to question if I wanted to carry on along the path I was treading.
I took the drastic decision to quit my job and even thought I had given up teaching.
I joined two businesses and took my first few steps in a new direction.
I am not saying it has all been plain sailing.
I have messed up, made unwise decisions and yes I have learned from mistakes.
I have had success and failure along the way.
I started to read avidly, choosing books because they grabbed my interest and the authors of these books recommended others.
Leaders in the businesses I am involved in have also recommended books, shared their time, tips and advice with me and little by little I have started to see life in a very different way.
I know now that any experience can be a good experience if you can learn from it.
I have just got back from a parents evening at the school where I work.
The parents were lovely, the Head bought everyone on the staff team chips and I was able to re-read a fantastic book on my journey home on the train. Instead of spending time fretting away thinking what if, what if, what if' I am learning to live in the present and make the most of any given situation.
If my car hadn't packed up I would never have done that and re-reading 'Go Pro - Eric Worre' was inspiring and reassuring.
I can honestly say I feel like my life is turning into an exciting adventure and look forward to finding out what will happen next!

thanks goodness for trains

Ok so I had to get up very early but at least I was able to get into work with only one train change.
I miss driving even though it has just been one day. ( It's knowing I don't currently have a working vehicle that feels weird)
I feel confident that I will find a great new little car very soon.
Since I took the decision to run my own businesses my whole outlook on life has changed.
I no longer feel defeated by dips in fortune. I am getting better at looking at things from a new angle or changing my approach to achieve more favourable outcomes.
It is exciting to think how much I have learnt these past few months.
I have a long way to go but am so happy I took the plunge when I did.